CAN A TEENAGER FALL IN LOVE?
I was hunting around on my favorite writer’s hang out on AW (Absolute Write Forums) and the topic of teen love came up. The question alluded to, ‘Does a teenager really fall in love?’ My honest opinion, why couldn’t they? In my book EXPLORER X – Alpha I tease on some of the facets of pre-teen love as I remembered it.
QUALITIES OF TEEN LOVE
I remember being in love as a teenager only about three times. Yep, three times. Each love was so fascinating, intense, exciting, all consuming, obsessive and hurt so badly when it ended. I would write the boys name in my notebook over and over again. I would think about them every free moment of the day. When I kissed that boy, it felt as though he was the sun and the moon of my very life at that time.
If I could bottle that up and sell it, it would be called LOVE POTION #9.
QUALITIES OF ADULT LOVE
For me, love as an adult, was a lot slower to burn than teenaged love. As an adult, I only allowed myself to fall in love with one person. The difference between my teen love and my adult love was drastic. As an adult, I was cautious, skeptical, held back a lot of myself until the guy proved that he was trustworthy, worth my time, interesting enough to hold my interest, and sexy enough to keep me attracted.
Did it have the intensity of teen love? No, not because I didn’t feel the things I felt for my love as a teenager. I didn't have the hormone high that I did as a teenager, or the time to obsess on the boy I was in love with. Also, as an adult I was just too jaded, mistrustful, and too smart to let anyone consume me that didn’t show that they were truly interested. Not to mention, the end of those teenaged love affairs were just too darned painful.
MY ANSWER TO THE QUESTION
Yes, teenagers can fall in love. All love starts out as an infatuation.. It starts with attraction, hunger, excitement, the chase, and hopefully ends in true love. True love, which consists of trust, passion, comfort, attraction, bonding, and most of all friendship, is worth the ride whether it ends badly or last forever.
In my case, a teen love became my adult love. As teenagers we broke up, but stayed friends. As adults we found that were a good match, and laughed at our antics in our relationship as teenagers. Whatever happened to the boy I fell madly in love with at fifteen, broke up with, and stayed friends with? He is now my husband of seventeen years. Yes, at times I do allow myself to feel all those things for him I did as a teenager, but my adult ways still makes me cautious to let it totally consume me.
REFLECTIONS ABOUT LOVE
My motto is and will always be, live your life and enjoy the adventure of it all.. That means whenever love is lost or you stumble along the way. Get up, dust off, plaster a smile on your face and focus on the exhilaration of the experience of love, of life, of failures, of pain, of recovery, and the adventure and experience of being able to live, learn, and to have loved.